John Cusack Saves the World - Jim Carrey Saves Christmas

How about that trailer for New Moon? There is so much beefcake on parade — with hot, shirtless men in the woods — the movie looks like a gay porno with the sex taken out.

I couldn’t make it to the press screening for the sexy sequel to Twilight, but read on for reviews of two big movies I did see before deadline.

Disney’s A Christmas Carol

I highly recommend you see this movie at the IMAX in Sacramento, where you can enjoy the special effects on their 60x80 foot screen. The snow just about falls in your lap, and Jim Carrey gives a performance that is even more in-your-face than usual, thanks to the amazing 3D.

I am not a huge fan of director Robert Zemeckis’ new ‘motion-capture’ style of movie-making, but Charles Dickens’ original story is just about indestructible, and the movie stays fairly close to the source material.

Whooshing through and over the streets of London isn’t a bad way to kill a couple hours at the movies.

2012

This preposterous orgy of special effects from doomsday director Roland Emmerich takes a nifty, 90-minute idea and stretches it out to an interminable, two-and-a-half hour length.

Unintentionally funny, the film is so bloated and over-produced that the only way to enjoy it is as a total laugh riot, with each disaster set piece more ludicrous than the last.

I am a fan of John Cusack, but he is an odd choice for an action hero, and Woody Harrelson’s bizarre, goofball performance is the scariest thing in the movie.